Trump: The Movie

Today’s post is a limerick authored by Politics and Other Stuff Editor Paul Fisk.

By Paul Fisk

Donald Trump is now causing us stress
Doing things we’ve never had to address
Alt-right thought it groovy
To produce “Trump: The Movie”
Now how do we get out of this mess?

Nursed on silver spoon rather than nipple
Or would not have caused any ripple
Thought he’d made a great play
But just as they say
Born on third base; claimed he’d just hit a triple

Devastated that he had to demur
And was forced by Draft Board to defer
He’d just love to enlist
If they didn’t insist
He was barred by that pesky bone spur

This con man was really all show
Proclaimed savior encased in gold glow
Saw himself as just glorious
But became notorious
For not paying folks he did owe

A patriot claimed through and through
Says was born to serve only you
He’d fight for your rights
Wear a cape and orange tights
Some believed that this was all true

If your audience you want to be wooing
And to keep your supporters from booing
Your opponents you decry
Then proclaim a big lie
And accuse them of what YOU are doing

On even minor things his lies don’t cease
In his ongoing quest us to fleece
BMI Index tight
Lied about weight and height
To appear one pound shy of obese

There are those who still believe all his jive
And all things that he does contrive
So they lap up his lies
And applaud what he tries
Drinking not KoolAid but Cult 45

Give rich millions promised downward to trickle
To be played with or saved by the fickle
Claim economy will grow
Though our history does show
Those below might at best see a nickel

Before Reagan came to the fore
Growth went to rich, middle and poor
But since then all new gains
Went to those with the reins
And the rich have received even more

We’ve shrunken our old middle class
And chosen the poor to harass
We’ve lowered the chances
Others may see advances
And rigged barriers they cannot surpass

We all know that he’s a bit kinky
With a reputation really quite stinky
So his claims to hire the best
Are as false as the rest
Look at Pruitt, Tom Price, and of course Zinke

In his bedroom alone he’s sublime
“Stable genius” in a Fox pantomime
Seeks validation on the phone
And tweets from the throne
Then calls it “Executive Time”

Tariff steel, aluminum, what’s next, Honda?
Or belated attacks on Jane Fonda?
With no thought or reflection
Spout another deflection
Like banning all aid to Wakanda

With insults and boasts that he’s hurled
We watched as folks hair became curled
With a frown on our brow
We realize he’s now
The laughing stock of the free world

Lips moving, so can’t believe a thing
Yet cultists will still kiss his ring
Moved by Coulter and Hannity
To borderline insanity
He’s clearly the real Lyin’ King

With thoughtlessness leaving us heady
And a keel that was far from steady
Thought shut down would be fun
Then learned what he’d done
His signature: “Fire, Aim, Ready”

A big wall is his policy fave
And he swears that he will not cave
Nancy’s not a meek mouse
Now that Dems have the House
Will the wall withstand the Blue Wave?

He owned casinos in a city of sins
Lost them all to history’s dust bins
Now facing the new Speaker
He’s considerably weaker
He should know that the House always wins

In the wake of the Democratic insurgency
Trump touted the wall need with urgency
Claimed now we must act
With no basis in fact
And doesn’t realize that HE’s the emergency

In trouble over business or sex
To recover from his own train wrecks
To settle bills that he gets
Or pay campaign debts
He’d write out foundation checks

Thinking he had nothing to lose
We now find out from the news
That without lamentation
He used his foundation
To pay his son’s Boy Scout dues

And that’s not all, he did more
Things that we now all abhor
Disregarding all strictures
He bought his own pictures
And hung them for guests to adore

He may claim that he wasn’t involved
In foundation’s crimes to be solved
But he ran it alone
His own opportunity zone
And the court said it must be dissolved

Long in widespread criminal violation
Hopefully going on a long unpaid vacation
Justice coming to this louse
Mueller saw Animal House
And put him on double secret probation

Let’s hope from his office he’s kicked
To resolve this constant conflict
More than Mueller to fear
It’s becoming more clear
From the courts of New York’s Southern District

After dodging the war in Viet
Went to Russia to place a new bet
Now denying collusion
And sowing confusion
He still claims “nothing but nyet”

Most weekdays stuck in DC metropolis
Stomach now needing milk acidophilus
Tried to blame dossier Steele
Claimed it all wasn’t real
But truth revealed by George Papadopoulus

Don’t know yet why Russia holds sway
And Trump sides with what Putin does say
But in most every facet
He acts like an asset
Our country he now seems to betray

With no belief in the rule of law
And in what could be the last straw
With no rhyme or reason
Except possibly treason
From NATO he wants to withdraw

Trump found lumps of coal in his stocking
And more and more people him mocking
At the end of this year
He’s in greater fear
As Mueller finds the guns that were “smocking”

He loves rally supporters’ cheers ringing
But it’s bad news to Donald we’re bringing
No more rolls in the clover
Cause it’s soon to be over
Hey, Donald, the Fat Lady’s singing

He acts as if things were sublime
While denying the change in our clime
But he should really worry
And should think of a jury
As it soon will be Mueller time

He’s right to be really scared
As more sordid facts do get bared
He knows he did blow it
But asks “How’d they know it?”
And Mueller says “I just went to Jared”

So when you’re trying for discourse with tact
And your red friends reject every fact
You might just share a flask
And then simply ask
“Then why does so guilty he act?”

Shot to power by a right wing catapult
He turned the GOP into a cult
Wasn’t up to the task
Just one question left to ask
Will they try him as an adult?

Still crying “NO COLLUSION” with bluster
His denials just do not pass muster
Soon it won’t be a mystery
Why he’ll go down in history
Below Nixon, Benedict Arnold and Custer

Trump team movie is a sorrowful tale
How our country was put up for sale
Can’t we skip all these edits
And just jump to the credits
Where it tells how long each went to jail?

One thought on “Trump: The Movie

  1. While his 33% exalt
    The rest of us pound salt
    The upside down flag is flying
    Children on the border are dying
    But hell it’s really Hillary’s fault

    I promise not to quit my day job.


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